Malaysian Drivers.

Hello folks. I'll start with the obligatory apology for not writing more. With that out of the way, I'll get down to the actual post.

For god knows why, today was hell in traffic. A journey which would normally take me 15 mins at most took roughly 40mins. All this in Subang as well. Bumper to bumper madness. Sitting in the jam though, I noticed a lot of things that can only be described as typical Malaysian driver's behaviour.

I'll do this in a list. A list of things I find extremely irritating on our Malaysian roads.

1. Idiots who don't understand the meaning of a line. Every single time there's a slightly long queue at a traffic light, I'm sure you will see this while sitting in line waiting. A small car, usually a Kelisa who thinks he's a bloody smart alec will wriggle his/her way to the emergency lane at the front of the line, hoping to cut in as soon as the light turns green. *Ehm* What makes them think their time is more important than all the other people waiting in line. Idiots.

2. Idiots who seem to think following an ambulance is very smart. As I sat in the jam today, an ambulance came screaming past but was held up at a traffic light, as cars moved to make way for it to go through, there was the usual line of buggers behind in, hoping to jump the queue and take advantage of a person in need of treatment. Not content with that, when the ambulance went through the red light, a string of cars followed it through. I mean, how badly do you need to jump ONE traffic light? I can bet you everthing I have that after doing that they would've a smug look on their face, relishing their infinite smartness. Idiots.

3. Motorcyclist who ride in the middle of the road. I'm sure you've been on the road, usually slightly bigger ones where there's this slow as hell motorcyclist smack in the middle of the road, and you can't really pass it, or when you do try to overtake it, he gives you that disgusted look as if you tried to stab his parents or something. Wait a minute, you're on a thing with 2 wheels, it's called a motorcycle. There's also another thing called a motorcycle lane. I'm sure you can put 2 and 2 together? And then there are those cyclists who weave in and out of traffic, Valentino Rossi wannabes. These are the ones where when you overtake them, they put up their hand in that "What the heck?" gesture. These are also the ones who get into accidents. Risking your own life is one thing, damaging our cars is another. Idiots.

4. Racer boys. Idiots who drive super-souped up cheap cars. Y'know those jacked up Wiras, Kancil's which sound loud, Sagas which spoilers are bigger than the cars? Thinking they own the road or are in a Need For Speed game. Weaving in and out of traffic. Once again these are the idiots who think they are extremely smart. Break down of them are like this:
Chinese: Usually slighty better cars, 350z's etc. Hair usually not the natural colour. Loud techno music.
Malays: One rank up from rempits. Usually local cars, which only the exhaust pipe has been modified.
Indians: Just plain fugly cars with loud booming tamil or techno music.
These are the ones where when you're trying to cut into another lane, they will try their level best not to give up their place, staying as close to the car in front as possible, looking straight, as if on the starting grid of an F1 race. Idiots.

Alright, that's all for this week. Thanx for tuning in. Take care, and drive safely.

Never take life seriously,
Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Chick of the Week: Zooey Deschanel

Alright, back to normal business. I'll put a bright spark in this gloomy rainy Sunday evening by bring you guys and girls, our Chick of the Week, American actress and musician Zooey Deschanel. Quirky, funny, and cute as hell, her latest famous movie was "The Happening" in which I have fallen in love with her. She has also acted in Elf, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and Bridge to Terabithia among many other films.

Not only stunningly beautiful, she can hold her own acting, delivering deadpan, scene-stealing lines. She's so cute that the fact she's 28 seems almost untrue. With a devilishly cheeky smile, she definitely deserves her place as our Chick of the Week. Enjoy.

Isn't this picture just adorable?

My favourite of the bunch.

P.S. If you click on the pictures, you can see them at their actual size.

Life moves pretty fast.
If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

Censored.

Howdy ladies and gents. Hope everyone has been fine. Today's topic will be about our very own, Malaysian Censorship Board. I'll try to stick to just the entertainment industry because I'm afraid if I dare venture further than that, I might end up like a certain "Raja". Seeing the government uses the ISA like using toilet paper while having diarrhea.

Well that's another story ain't it? So, the censorship board. Something I've been willing to get off my chest since forever. I'm not sure if Astro goes through with the same process as our censorship board but it's equally bad. I'm not sure if you guys and gals know, but Astro has a 3 minute delay from the actual broadcast in "live" telecasts. This 3 minutes, are used to filter out stuff they deem "inappropriate". Well, that about beats the purpose of "Live" fucking TV, doesn't it?

"It's Live, but 3 mins late." WTF?! So the spontaneaus argy bargy that goes on such as the Madonna Britney kiss from the VMAs among other things, will just be another FeBreeze advert or something like that. Why? Because they don't think we should see it. Let me ask you something, Astro Censorship. Are we paying extra just so we can enjoy "live" tv? Or rather, are we paying extra to watch proper tv? I can understand if TV1 chooses to censor every single kiss and cleavage that goes on tv, but thats because we're not paying for TV1, they should be able to decide what they want to show. We ARE paying for Astro however, but we still get half-chopped movies, slowed down "steamy" scenes and 3 minute delays.

If there were another network that did not do this, I would definitely be the first to jump ship. Unfortunately, living in Malaysia, means that every network would be subject to this joke of a entertainment industry.

Alright then, forget about Astro for a minute. We DO get some good stuff on there, despite it usually being at least a year late, but lets leave that for later. Let's move on to the actual censorship board of Malaysia. How many times have you gone into the Cinema, paid your 10 bucks, to watch a 18 movie. For example, an 18 SG (Sungguh Ganas!) movie, and had every single "fuck", "shit" and "bitch" censored out. What's so bloody ganas about the movie if they can't even swear on screen. Another question to the board, if every bloody thing is already censored out, why in the whole bloody world, is it labelled 18? Is it any different from a U movie? No.

Boobs? Out. Cleavage? Out. Fuck? Out. Shit? Out. Bitch? Out. Violence? Out. Sex scenes? Out. Drugs references? Out.

Jesus Christ. 18 SX (Presumably sex) without sex or semi-nudeness. 18 SG without swearing and violence. 18 PL is a combination, so nothing in there. What is the easiest solution? Buy the pirated DVD of course! The Unrated version, where you can see all the swearing or sex you want. And there they are going on about anti-piracy.

Hello braindead religious dicks, well done. Pat yourself on the back because you're fuelling the pirate business.

I'll give all of you some good examples.

Watched Hitman? Every swear word out, all "intimate" scenes out.

I didn't watch the Departed in the cinema, and am glad I did not. If you have watched this, you'll get what I mean. It would be like the old days, watching a silent movie.

Watched Tenacious D on Astro? The climax of the movie, where they battle Satan, is censored out. Presumably because once we see Satan holding a guitar, with Dave Grohl's voice, we'll all convert into satanists. A good 15 mins or so, which made the whole movie meaningless. I mean, if you want to take out such a big chunk of the movie, why bring it in in the first place? Oh right, cause it's the Malaysian Censorship Board. People who probably censor out everything then go back home and watch some animal porn or something.

Latest dumb fucking movie was, Knocked Up. I hadn't watched this movie before so I took the opportunity when it came on Astro. The whole scenes, where he "knocks her up" is out. Presumably because, if we watch acted out sex on tv, we will go ahead and rape. Ensuing dialogue where they refer to the one night stand and why he didn't wear a condom, left me clueless. I didn't know what they did, or why. They just show them waking up the next morning. Apparently there's a scene with strippers in Vegas, gone. Again, same as above. Why bother bringing it in, when you're gonna take out all the main plot points. Makes it sort of pointless.

Also if anyone watches America's next top model or Australia's next top model, you will realise that anytime at all they refer to nudity or boobs, the picture suddenly lags, or even worse, they just rewind the footage and play it again, over the voice. Presumably because, girls will then wear nothing when they go out? The original version obviously has some semi-nudity or I dunno, maybe girls in their undergarments. Nope, since your parents or whoever obviously don't care that you're watching it, or maybe, you're old enough, we will take the role of your parents, and we have decided you cannot watch that part.

And people wonder why the Westerners are so mature at a younger age. How does a nation grow up, when a 50 year old man, has what he watches on TV, filtered out for him by a few donkeys in some darkroom.

18 ratings have absolutely no impact whatsoever on anything. I remember they had a period where they had Police at cinemas, stopping underage people from going into 18 movies. For what? What are they gonna see? Chopped off sex scenes? Muted cursing? Blacked out "overly violent" scenes?

Exactly.

Who judges the judges?

Rest of the Days: Liverpool, Windemere, and the End.

Aloha guests, as usual I'll start this post with an apology for not writing more often. I usually write only when I really feel like writing. Some may see this as laziness and yes it is, but it is also to ensure you will not get half-assed posts about minute details about my daily life. Such as did or did I not wax my legs, paint my nails and gel my hair today. That sort of stuff can be found all over in many many other blogs.

So yeah, just to get this London trip out of the way, I'm gonna briefly wrap up the remainder of the trip. This is so I can get back to my regular blogging about nonsense and also because the rest of the trip was void of any hot girls in close proximity bar 1 or 2 random ones.

So, I'll pick up from after the Paris day-trip. Well the day after the trip we did nothing much. Stayed in London and went to Chinatown to pick up a few souvenirs and just basically do nothing much. Visited Lilywhites though, which was awesome.

The day after that, was actually the day I was pretty much looking forward to the most coming on this trip. The day we would leave London for Liverpool. Took the train from our Gloucester station to the central point, which I cannot remember the name. And from there boarded the train to Liverpool Lime Street. I think the ride took 2 hours but it was smooth and comfortable all the way.

Forgive me but I can't remember exact details at the moment due to the long time I have taken to write up this trip. Anyway, in Liverpool I stayed at the Travel Lodge. Which is a chain of some sort around England I think. It's a very modern place for tourists, clean and sterile.

We walked around the area near to where we stayed, which was actually really close to Liverpool One, which is their central shopping area. Very chic and clean. Ate lunch at the docks, which is surrounded by shops, upmarket pubs and restaurants. Ate at a pub-cum-nightclub. Nice cosy place. I also visited the Beatles museum which was pretty nice. They recreated the Cavern inside there which I thought was brilliant. It's structured really nicely and the only gripe was I wished I had more time inside.

I had to rush or I would've missed the Anfield tour. Took a cab to Anfield from there and it was a pretty short ride. Cabs in England are pretty cool. They're old looking cars but fully modified to be nothing but a cab. Here, cabs are just cars which are painted differently and driven by cheating gangsters. Over there, cabs look nothing like a normal car. Their backseat fits 4, all facing each other Limo style. The driver sits alone in front and is shielded from the passengers by a plexiglass window. Even if you want to, you can not sit next to the driver as there is no seat there.

Reaching Anfield, I just had to marvel at actually standing there. Went in to sort out a few details about our tour and then we went into the museum which holds all the throphies and just cool stuff, including the European Cup won for the 5th time, meaning they were able to keep the real thing, the same one Manchester United won in 1999, being kept safely in the Anfield Museum.

Went on the tour of Anfield then, and among us there was one Arsenal fan and a Man United one, obviously being the main targets for the rest of the tour. Went into the interview areas, player changing rooms, refree changing rooms, and finally walked down into the ground itself, touching the legendary This Is Anfield sign on the way of course. One cool thing was when we were walking down the tunnel, they played a recorded clip of what the players hear when they walk out, thunderous cheering and singing from the fans.

In the ground itself, got to sit where the players sit, where Alex Ferguson sits and just basically absorb the whole experience in. Also of course got to stand on the Kop End, from which the Arsenal fan was shown the exact spot Ryan Babel went down in the penalty box. I'm sure you all know which one.

The tour concluded and we went to Liverpool One to do some shopping. Ate at their McDonalds which is totally different to our shit one in Malaysia. They actually have edible stuff there. Their Burger King is more similar to ours, but their breakfast is the bomb. Some sausagey thing which tasted pretty damn good. Also had lunch at Nando's there, which is also almost exactly the same as the Malaysian one. In there though there were these 2 race models, I think they were race models anyway. Dressed in the skimpiest skirts you will ever see with makeup to look like Roxanne. Needless to say every single guy was staring at them every opportunity they got and every girl was giving them dirty looks for even being alive. Oh yeah, in the Liverpool One store, the sweetest girl attended to me. They had a few mistakes done on my jersey so she got me sorted out and was just really helpful in general. Of course the Liverpool accent did no harm to how adorable she looked. I love European accents, English and Irish ones in particular.

Left Liverpool and headed for Windemere after that. In Windemere, I stayed in a bed and breakfast place. It is basically just a house, which the owners rent out the rooms. Beautiful place, very charming. There we went on a tour of 10 lakes, in which a old man took us around the Lake District giving us commentary in the process and I will not even bother explaining it in words because I simply cant. The view, the beauty and just the serenity of the place is beyond words. The green and slow pace of life there is just really so appealing and you can sit on a moutaintop and stare at a lake for days and even then you might still not get over how beautiful it is.

If someone came up to me and said Malaysia was going to sink in 2 days and I would have to Windemere to stay, lets just say, I wouldn't think twice about it. The town is next to a lake and walking there at night is really beautiful. Really calm and homey. Well I guess all small towns are like that, where everyone knows everyone. Just a really really nice place to stay. Ah, it may seem as if I don't have much to write about Windemere but because I didn't really do anything much there. You have to be there to understand and just soak it in. You don't even have to plan anything. Just stay in a B&B, take long walks everyday and thats basically it. The beauty of a simple life.

The next couple of days were spent back in London. Did some more shopping and then went to see a play. Stomp. If you don't know what this is, just look up Stomp Out Loud, the DVD. It is a percussion unit where they use everyday objects to make beats and music. From trash can covers, broomsticks, plastic bags, lighters and even sinks. I've seen many plays in my time but I have to say this was the best experience of them all. The auditorium was small, which amplifies the closeness and sound of the performers and you can see their facial expressions and intensity. No sound is wasted due to the size of the place.

We also visited the National Museum in which there were many interesting things, including, the Rosetta Stone, which I find extremely fascinating. Look it up on Wikipedia.

Well, that's about it. After that, the next day I flew back to home sweet home, Malaysia. Funnily though, after every trip, even the good ones, Japan, Thailand, Bangkok, when on the way home and when I come back, I always think, well that was really nice, but it's nice to be home. Y'know, being home-sick on the way home. But after this trip, I was sorta sorry to be back. Almost as if I would rather have lived there much longer. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to appreciate that I had the chance to go there and hopefully return there one day to live or work maybe?


Reasons to stay in Europe:






P.S. All the pictures, whether in Sepia or in full colour can be found on my facebook photos.

Sepia:http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=55584&l=26e77&id=563730916
Colour:http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=60921&l=32939&id=563730916

What doesn't kill you,
Only makes you stronger.

Day 4: Baguettes, Pyramids and a certain Eiffel.

Allo there people. Really sorry for the long delay between posts. I just don't have to time or patience to sit down and write at the moment. No idea why, but it's just like that. So, back to the London trip then. Day 4, one of the more interesting days.

Day 4 of the trip began with me waking up at 4 or 5am if I remember correctly. It was some ungodly hour where the sky is still dark and lazy Londoners are still enjoying their sleeps. Being in London and on a trip though, waking up at times like this is actually acceptable. You walk out into the cool morning air, sniffing in the oxygen in London, which is slowly starting to become familiar and very pleasant.

Well.... we get into a van which is like the local handler for the tour company in which we decided to take for this day trip. Anyway it's like 4 or 5 in the morning, I'm cheerful but still half asleep. We pull up at Holiday Inn I think and whoa, out comes 2 pretty hot ladies. One of which looks like a thinner version of Angelina Jolie. They were really friendly too, exchanging Hi's and what not as soon as they boarded the van. Turns out they were Canadians who were also on a trip of London, and also on this tour to Paris. By the way, if you 2 are reading this, I tried my best not staring at you the whole time, and believe me I did not.

So joined by another slightly older couple from the US of A, we were dropped off at the train station to board the Eurostar. Armed with a panini, which were starting to become my favourite form of food, we boarded the Eurostar, preparing for a 2 hour train ride under the sea into Paris. Oh and yes, I was sitting next to the Canadians. (What's with Canadians and trips with me? First girl guides and now Angelina Jolie?)

When we reached Paris, the Paris du Nord I think, is their "main" train station. Joined up with other people from London as well I think, including a young American girl in her 20s. No I am not a pervert reporting on every girl I see, it's just that, it's really surprising to see a young person travelling on their own. Well maybe New Yorkers are braver than the rest of the world?

Started off right outside the train station with a very very cheerful and helpful tour guide which reminded me slightly of a young David Hasselhoff maybe? We were all led onto a double decker bus with the top floor open-air. Lovely way to be brought around really. So the bus just got going and our guide told us what was going on as the bus moved, like any other tour. Saw the ballet theater which used to be a theater for plays if I'm not mistaken. Very grand place built by some king or something. Thing about France is, most of their buildings have these small details on the exterior which just adds that grandeur to it, making even the most normal buildings look solid and artistic in certain ways.

The tour continued with us going into the heart of France, passing their fashion street which boasts the biggest names in fashion, including the headquarters and flagship store of Louis Vuitton. Ah yes, another thing about France, or the French rather is that, everyone is dressed sharply. Unlike England or Malaysia where you see people loafing around coffeeshops or whatever in simple comfort clothes, the French are dressed very well whereever they go. Probably is what helps you tell the locals from the foreigners. They all look sleek in their trenchcoats, designer sunglasses, boots and what-have-you.

So then, gawking at all the nice cars along the way, we made it to that famous French arc that you see usually in French shows or promos. The name eludes me but the detail on this thing is simply amazing. Even from the bus, I could see that the amount of detail on the arch itself, the designs on the nooks and crannies, the expressions of each and every soldier statue. Simply magnificent. Continued into the center of Paris, which has an Obelisk given to them by the Egyptians if I'm not mistaken. It's a sharp spear-like statue with the tip made of gold or something.

After that we made our way to the Eiffel Tower. I know we see it all the time in commercials and movies but when you're there, looking at it in person, it's simply breathtaking. Built so long ago, it's so symmetrical, just a wonder of joined steel. The gigantic size of it really just causes you to stand and stare it it, slack jawed. When we finished taking some pics from below, we took an elavator to the middle level. Which is adorned with the Euro stars because France is the leader for UN or something this term. The view from up there really is amazing. You have a panoramic view of Paris and I swear I felt the tower sway more than once due to the strong winds. Enjoying the view from above and taking some truly spectacular pictures, we decided to go down. Took the steps by the way, all 700 of them. Oh and we were one of the many tour-members who decided to forgo the lunch on the Eiffel. France's best chef was cooking that day and it cost up to RM300 per person to dine several hundred meters in the air.

When we were done, we proceeded onto a nice boat for a cruise on the river. There, we just took in the sights of beautiful Paris and listened to the translator on some phone-like thing. Very very beautiful with quaint little stories for certain sites. They have some sort of Beach, which is like sand poured onto one of the concrete river-banks. And there really are people just lying around there on deck chairs.

After the cruise, we went to the Louvre, the famous museum that holds super artworks such as the Mona Lisa and made even more famous by The Da Vinci code. Unfortunately the Louvre closes on the day we were there, so we just walked around it, and even then like I said, the detail on the exterior of the Louvre is simply crazy. Every arch, every single bend or whatever is just filled with detail, carvings and everything. Then of course, we saw the world-famous Pyramid and the inverted one as well, which in the Da Vinci code is claimed where Mary Magdalene is.

Refreshed by seeing the Louvre, our next destination was a Church. Once again I'm sorry but the name just escapes me. Our guide, being an excellent one, decides to forgo the bus ride and take us on a walk, from the Louvre to the Church. I don't know if he does this all the time but the fact that he was willing to take us through back-alleys and walk all the way, showing us the way of life in Paris from the groundlevel was really good. Our Angelina Jolie was wearing this fierce high-heeled boots and as soon as he suggested walking, everyone sort of looked at her. She of course, replied that she had shopped 6 hours straight in boots so it was a small matter to her.

So off we went, walking, we saw the house of some famous painter, once again I do not remember but I will when I see the picture. Just enjoying the small roads of Paris, the lesser known side-walk cafes and just their ongoings in general. You just get the feeling that they enjoy life a whole lot more than we do. They take time out to just sit down at a cafe, chat, have an espresso, smoke, you know, just relax and enjoy the moment for hours. If I get the opportunity, which I might, I would definitely not balk at choosing to live there, whether temporarily or for longer. The way of life is just so laid-back.

Reached the church and like the one in England, this one was enourmous. I think it was a gothic-styled church, so very high up, very strong, very menacing almost. It was pretty dark inside as well. Done with the church, we headed to La Fayettes, hope I got the spelling right. It's their equivalent of Harrods. Well, everything is nice to see but will cost you an arm, a leg and maybe more to buy.

After that, we bid our tour-guide adieu and headed back to London via the Eurostar again. Yet again, yes, I was sitting next to our "friend". I missed something though, when I was sleeping. Apparently there was an emergency on board the train and they paged for a doctor. Our sultry friend, responded to the call!!! And she managed to cure whoever was having difficulties because they then presented her with a bottle of Champagne!!! WOW! This is like when you see a proverb book and there is "Don't judge a book by it's cover". They should have her picture there next to the example!!! Who ever knew doctors dressed like French models?! Maybe Canadian ones?

As we reached London, we sorta just collapsed into bed and that was that. End of day 4!

Unfortunately, I have a lack of pics from Paris as my phone died midway thru. When I get pics from my digital cam though, I will post 'em up. Till then, hang in there and cheers.

The full album is available at http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=55535&l=05eb2&id=563730916 It's all from my mobile and all taken in Sepia.

Don't argue with an idiot,
The Spectators can't tell the difference.